Ulgrim Sayings - From the Darkest Depths

Gharu'ndim

Sho

Viamontians

Ispar History

Auberean History

Texts

Rumors

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "What's translucent and dark and shadowy all over?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Awww! Everyone seems to get that one! I'll have to think of something harder..."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "All right, what blinks red and green and gold and is shadowy all over?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "A Shadow with some Holiday Lights!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You doubt my chess abilities? Let me put it this way. Have you ever heard of Yuri, Bobby, Trumper, Blue?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Morons."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Count Dardante? Oh brother. Don't get me started. You know, we used to be in the theatre department together in our days in the academy. He always wanted to play the role of the mustache-twirling villain, like King Arpad in "The Trials of the Poet.""

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I've got me a Red Sigil Silveran Mug right here. You can't see the sigil because it's at the bottom of the mug. Yeah, every time I drain the mug and look into its bottom, I see the bright light of its enchantment..."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You know, I would lay even money that Count Dardante is actually working for... Them. You know who the Them are, don't you? Well if you don't, I'm not going to tell you!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Dark! Darkness envelops us all! We are doomed! Doooooomed! Run for the vaults! Save the children! Save the stout! He comes and all is lost before him."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "That's what I would sound like if I weren't so deeply reassured by Elysa's ability to handle the Shadows."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "They've raised another island? Hogwash. My spy network of mermen would have told me about it by now. Besides, that island wasn't supposed to be raised until I'd cleared all my treasure chests off of it."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Boy, if it gets any crazier around here, I might just have to pack up and move back to Ispar. No, don't bother to ask if you can come with me. My magic carpet is only big enough for me and my keg of stout."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Have you noticed how dazed the people at fishing holes look?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Just try talking to one of them. You'll be lucky if they even acknowledge you. More than likely they'll just stand there casting and casting and casting."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "They're Fishing Zombies! Fishing Zombies I tells you!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Oh yes, there's something new in the sky, and it's not a Gromnatross. Well, maybe it is, but if it is, it's the ugliest Gromnatross I've ever seen."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I went to visit the fortune shrine today. Want to hear my fortune?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You will fall into a very deep hole and your broken body will slowly be devoured by the foul things that reside in the lightless places."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "That didn't sound so good."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "My lucky numbers are 6,6,6."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Yesterday, I almost drank a one that was not cold. Good thing I caught myself in time!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I saw a cute little Ursuin Cub the other day. I tried to pat it on the head. Cute little teeth on that cub. See my cute little bite mark?"


Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I'll never forget how you helped me out with that whole broken wand problem. I really owe you one."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "So... here."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant gives you Stout.
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You deserve that... Fred. Fredrina? Bah, whatever."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You cannot always acquire what you desire. You cannot always acquire what you desire. But if you attempt it occasionally, you potentially could discover, that you acquire what you require. I'm thinking of setting it to music."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "You know what the Virindi call a Royal Atlatl with Deadly Darts?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "A Royal Atlatl with Deadly Darts. The Virindi aren't all that creative."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Old Jaleh is dead. I think we should elect a new leader for Ayan Baqur
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Now let's see... who would make a good leader?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "No, I couldn't!"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Could I?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I'll do it! I will shoulder the heavy burden of leadership."
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "First law I pass? Free drinks for the Mayor!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I hear if you lick a Burun you can see all sorts of cool stuff."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "If we build a new town I say we call it Ulgrim's Ridge. Now that's a town name with style!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "On second thought, maybe I don't want Dardante and the Shadows and the Raven Hand and Varicci to go to the Deep. That's where I keep all my stuff, after all..."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I have to catch up on the rest of the year's drinking in case I get captured by Shadows and forced to become a raging beast."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Stupid Raven Hand! Stupid Dardante! Stupid Shadows! Stupid Varicci!"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I warned them! I told them! But do they listen?"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Nooo, don't listen to old Ulgrim, he's a crazy drunk, he's not right in the head!"
Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Well, they can all go to the Deep for all I care!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "They say that Grael has three aspects: ale, lager, and stout. No, wait, that's not right..."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Yeah, I visited the Rossu Morta Chapterhouse. Nice enough, but it smells of cheese. And they've got a portrait of that big-nosed King of theirs hanging up. It should be a portrait of me!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I've seen people carrying those fancy new Silveran weapons around. They don't look like very practical weapons, do they? Look like the kind of thing that one of those hoity-toity Virindi like Claude or Leopold would dream up."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I've got me a Red Sigil Silveran Mug right here. You can't see the sigil because it's at the bottom of the mug. Yeah, every time I drain the mug and look into its bottom, I see the bright light of its enchantment..."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Did you ever wonder where the eggs we eat come from? And what about the supposed chicken our cooks make? I don't eat either of them... just in case."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "I stepped on a spider today. I used to let spiders go, because hey, they kill insects, right? But you just can't take your chances these days."

Ulgrim stumbles and mutters something unintelligible, "Y syh uhla tnaysat ra fyc y piddanvmo. Frah ra yfuga, ra hu muhkan ghaf ev ra fyc y piddanvmo tnaysehk ra fyc y syh, un y syh fru ryt tnaysat ra fyc y piddanvmo."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Bah! I told you so!"

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "People keep asking me where Asheron has gone. As if I'd know. I'm just an old man who drinks too much and fabricates wild stories to make myself seem important. No, wait, Asheron's the one who does that..."

Ulgrim the Unpleasant tells you, "Yeah, I visited the Whispering Blade Chapterhouse. It's nice enough, but kind of boring. It could really use an open bar."

Thanks to Wildshot of WE!